Bible Answer: Greetings in Jesus' holy name. We thank you for your candid letter. And we also rejoice that you have come to the Lord. Yes, it is an absolute fact, the only way one can find spiritual freedom from sin addiction is to come to Jesus. Pornography (lusting in the heart) is certainly under that category and according to Jesus, such a form of adultery can send one to Hell:
Mat 5:28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Mat 5:29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.The best way to walk pure and upright consistently before the Lord is to have your mind locked on spiritual things. Hence, we recommend hiding God's word in your heart so that you will not sin against him. Furthermore, get involved in serving the Lord. If your mind is active in these endeavors, the various filthy things that you have seen in the past will not have the hold they once did. They will become less and less strong to the point that they vanish completely. It would also be a great idea for you to read a minimum of one or two hours of the Bible every day, schedule permitting -- putting what you find there into practice. Have you listened to our on-line sermon entitled, "The Why and How of Memorizing Scripture"? If not, take an hour and listen to it. It should help you much. Christian Sermons
Regarding a role model, the Christian's role model is none other than the Lord Himself. So the best thing that you can do is to so learn his word that after a period of time, you will be able to more or less know what Jesus would do in a given situation.
Please know you are in a very intense spiritual battle. The devil not only wants to destroy your marriage but wants to damn your eternal soul. He has been very successful using pornography in the past with many, but he will not hurt you if you abide by the rules as set down in Scripture. You must not violate what the Bible teaches. Get in it, learn it, even memorize it as though your life depends upon it, for it surely does, that is, your eternal existence especially depends upon it! Please do not follow the crowd. Get serious with God.
This is what you need to do, but you also need to cut out various forms of satanic temptation, even the subtle ones, such as watching TV and listening to secular music over the radio. These are two very powerful mediums in which the devil has seduced many into various forms of immorality. TV addiction has a great hold on many. In our day, many think they can't even exist without the television. This is an absolute lie. My wife and I have not watched TV for years! We don't even get the news from TV! It is a great blessing to have all this extra time to get into the Scriptures and to serve our precious God.
Please do not hesitate to write again if we can help you somehow. GOD BLESS YOU.